Everything seems to be rooted in ones childhood so all i got to go on is the nightmares of my childhood. As a child i watched the finish cartoon seris “Moomin” on tv and i really loved it, but every now and again a certain character apeared.
One particular character that was very unlike all the other chracters. I am ofcourse talking about “The Groke”. (Initial clip that made me scared, In finish but it’s th eatmosphere that is scary not the dialogue)
This character terrorized my childhood, i could not sleep and i would always dream dreams of The Groke slowly aproching our house and that awful music would play on loop.
The Groke still scares me to this day, sends shivers down my spine when i hear the name, and the music makes me uncomforable. This is to no extent complicating my life anymore, but as for a person who usally isn’t scared for anything,
…I am scared of.
Not sure what goes for memorable, but there was this one time where my class in junior high had a field trip to an exhibit themed around throwing curve balls to your expectations.
For example, there was a big banner outside of the museum saying “The key is under the doormat” and funny enough, there was a key under the doormat to the enterance. At that point i thought that this was gonna be an interesting exhibit.
While i was taken back to the lack of visual and what i find interesting art and the huge amount of prefomance art that was on exhibit. These artists were going for one thing and one thing only: shock value.
-Hanging explicit porn in smal frames all neatly arranged on a dresser.
-Videos of people bound with boxes on their heads banging against the walls.
-Used toilet paper and empty lube bottles scattered around.
(Some of my class mates said they saw a shirne to hitler, i didn’t find it so i’m not sure if it was true or not)
Anyways, when us the 14 year olds started to react to these things the guide gave us a lecture in how nazies killed homosexuals durning ww2 sortof guilt tripping us into liking or atleast respect the art. Looking back at it now i find it a little humorus, but i think the artists that put it together had some strange ideas about conveying their message in a way that can be respected.
If i were to go through the same exhibit again today i think i’d leave pretty quickly after i realized how pretensious the people behind it seemed. Well, maybe not, i always go by myself in art galleries, having a guide with me is very annoying. Maybe the guide and having to deal with all my class mates blatant jokes and choking down my own desire to leave made my views of the exhibit biased.
Regardless, dont know why the school decided to run a class of 50 immature teenagers there. Also don’t know why the museum would hire such a immature guide.
Otherwise i’ve made sure to go on my own, seen lots of neat stuff, nothing out of the ordinary has ever happened though besides the time i just mentioned.
While i don’t draw anything for attention anymore, that was a promise to myself when i changed my name, i don’t draw to explore my own creative abilities. Sure, in some regard i do; but most of the time it’s to get something out of my system.
I use my emotions as a drive to draw, i find anger, pain and sadness to be the ones that give me the “best results”. I take all my bad feelings and turn them into something good. People have said: “what can possibly be positive about something so dark like grimdark?” or “If you didn’t draw so dark things and listen to this creepy music you woulnd’t feel like this y’know?”. That is all complete bullshit.
I draw the things i do to channel my emotions into something else, something people can enjoy. If so little as 5 people click that like button i concider the drawing a sucsess both at channeling my emotions and reaching out to others. Positive feeling i get from seeing people like and reblog my pictures is undescribable. One time I even got a 100 people to like a picture. To me that is huge.
I could go on and on about ask-blogs who are basically rip-offs and how we really don’t need another cupcakes based blog etc.
TL:DR: If you are doing something for fame, you should reconsider you priorities. I draw because i love to and because i love it when people feel something by looking at my art. If all you do is look at notes and followers counts to messure your sucess. Spare yourself and quit. You have better things to do.
This is probably a big tangent from what you were asking about, but hey; i got an excuse to talk about it.
Naww, thank you. It mean’s a lot to hear you say that.
What you just said sums up my thoughts about the subject of follower posts pretty well. While i don’t find it weird that artist highlight the bigger blogs (It’s all a big circle jerk y’know) I still don’t condem anyone for doing it. I’m distanced from the community with my weird name and freaky art and i don’t think a few more hundered followers would make me feel anymore special or happy. So i just stick to my own guns and make content for the people who i know love it.
Hopefully that didn’t come off as too pretentious.
Oh! Thank you very much, i don’t get compliments and comments on my art a lot. :)
Why i’m unpopular? Not sure, maybe i’m a little depressing and people tend to favor art that is more refined? I have no idea, i figured my particular style is more appealing for sub-groups in this community and the people who appreciate it are not as connected as people who just want to see pretty pictures. I also don’t pander and do follower posts like at all, I figure that makes me a little isolated from the comunity.
Either way, I apreciate the followers I have and especially the ones who are active and reblog my things. It means a lot to me and i love ‘em to death.
seems to be dig up anons you’ve forgotten/ignored day today.
i’ve never been know to do requests, but still this popped up out of nowhere a few months ago.
I didn’t have anything more interesting, i’m not popular enough for anon hate haha.